Sunday, March 30, 2008

Death road survivors


Biking down the world's most dangerous road is not everyone's idea of fun, but we loved it. Five hours of downhill madness and one massive stack in the group that, thankfully, didn't end in major injuries but was caught on video. Here's the route:
  • Start at La Cumbre, 4640m above sea level. Up here it's freezing. There's snow and fog so thick that you can't see the 100-metre sheer drop to your right.
  • Super fast ashpalt. This is meant to be the easiest part of the track, but that doesn't matter when you're flying over your handlebars at the first bend (see video of stack below).
  • Long dark tunnel
  • Police coca checkpoint
  • Chuspipata, the beginning of the death road. It's rocky, it's muddy and it's skinny. It's also seen more deaths than any other road in the world. The last tourist to die on this road was an Israeli, who thought it was a good idea to play chicken with his mate until he ended up off the cliff.
  • El Semaphoro
  • The corners of death
  • San Juan Waterfall. In 1983, a bus veered off the road at this point and into a canyon, killing more than 100 passengers in what is said to be Bolivia's worst road accident.
  • Muddy dusty part
  • Red mountain balcony
  • Yolosani River
  • Finish at Yolosa, 1295m above sea level. Safe and sound.

Us biking under San Juan waterfall


THE STACK
*No one was hurt seriously in the making of this video, but it looks pretty painful. Don't watch if you're not into pain.


Press play to watch


Saturday, March 29, 2008

The colours of Bolivia


Inside San Pedro Prison

The main entrance to San Pedro (photo courtesy of the BBC)

The gringos serving time in San Pedro say it's more like a hostel than a prison. And when you're inside their section, which is set apart from the general population, you could almost buy that.

Things are a little run down, but that's no different from most hostels. Their rooms are comfortable, if a little cramped. They have internet access, telephones, a small library, a gym and a sunny courtyard that's always full of people chatting, playing cards or reading books. They can buy beer and whiskey, hamburgers and chips, order takeaway, invite friends to visit and even bring in prostitutes for the night. There are no guards on patrol and no lights out. But there are still gates. And they shut firmly behind you when you enter. Unlike us, many of these guys won't leave for very long time.

"This is my fifth prison," says our guide, Stuart. "It's the best one. If you're going to do time somewhere, I could think of worse places."

Stuart's from Zimbabwe. He's a short, slightly built man, with long red hair and a swollen, discoloured nose from years of alcohol abuse. In a former life, he was a jockey. Now he's a drug smuggler, awaiting sentencing in Bolivia's largest prison. He was caught trying to smuggle cocaine out of La Paz in wooden picture frames. The picture frames were meant to have been soaked in a chemical for four weeks. According to Stuart, this is a sure-fire way to keep the sniffer dogs away. "But my packer only soaked them for three weeks, so they found the cocaine and I ended up here," he says matter-of-factly. He's facing a 15-year term but he's banking on Bolivian inefficiency to get him out.

"The Bolivians have to sentence me before the 9th of July, and if they don't I'm a free man," he says. "I can walk right out of here."

Stuart takes us on a short tour, giving us the ins-and-outs of prison life. Inmates in San Pedro have to buy their own cells when they enter. Some people buy extra cells, which they use as investments or shops. In this section, the cheapest cell goes for $US400, the most expensive $US40,000.

A well-dressed, softly spoken Columbian man owns the most expensive cell. It's three storeys, with a kitchen, cable TV and a view of the city. It's not flash but it's the best digs you can get in San Pedro. The owner is serving a 25-year sentence. He was a big hitter. A Columbian drug baron, caught with a plane full of drugs.

A few doors down is a young Canadian guy. He was caught with one gram of cocaine in a hotel, and is serving a six month sentence. A few doors down from him, a prisoner lives with his wife and five children. His wife runs the main store in this part of the prison and the kids leave the prison every afternoon to go to a nearby school.

A well-dressed middle aged man walks by, and Stuart tells us that he was a police officer, until he was caught holding up an armed vehicle holding $US1.5 million. He's now the most
important person in this section, acting as the middle man between the prisoners and the Colonel who runs the prison.

We meet a young south African guy whose been in for three months. He won't say what he did and he hasn't been sentenced. He talks to his family regularly, but hasn't told them he's in prison. He's hoping to get out in a few months and pass the period off as an extended holiday. Fransisco is from Portugal. His girlfriend has just moved into his cell.

This is where we end up at the end of the tour, drinking beer and chatting. If you want, you can also buy a half a gram of cocaine for 20 bolivianos (about £1.50) or a joint for 10 bolivianos (£0.75).


Ironically, drugs are freely available in San Pedro. There are factories inside the main section, churning out some of the world's purest cocaine. During the day, the gringos send a runner to get supplies from the general population. At night, little white parcels are flung through gaps in the wall separating the two sections.

After a few hours, we say goodbye and head for the gate. Without thinking, we wish Stuart luck with his July 9 deadline. We collect our passports from the guards, and walk out. The gates clang behind us. We're free.

*To get a better feel for life in the prison, pick up a copy of Marching Powder by Rusty Young. The gringos inside the prison will tell you that the book is 20% true and 80% bullshit, but it makes for a good read regardless.


Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Just call us tarzan and jungle jane!

We think we've earned the smug grins we're wearing right now.

We stumbled out of the jungle today, filthy, sweaty and smelly, to find the permanent camp full of people. They looked a little surprised to see us and were suitably impressed when we told them that we'd been dossing on the jungle floor while they'd been languishing here with their showers and toilets and little wooden cabins.

For a couple of city slickers, I don't think we've done too bad. Elu thinks we covered at least 35km on our hikes. We've slept on the jungle floor. Bathed in a river with alligators. Drunk water from a tree. Learned which trees and plants give you garlic, ginger, rubber, red dye, and poison. And our animal and bug tally looks pretty good, even if we didn't see a giant tarantula or come face to face with a jaguar.

Carl relaxes on the boat ride back to civilisation

Monday, March 24, 2008

What's worse: the sound of animals you can't see or the sight of animals you don't hear?

We're not sure.

So far, we can count the number of animals we've seen in the jungle on one hand. But last night there were definitely things creeping around our camp.

There's no mistaking the sound of a wild pig digging around in search of food or the screech of howler monkeys in the trees above. It's the more subtle sounds that make you worry like twigs snapping, the rustle of leaves in a nearby bush or the soft thump of something walking on your mosquito net. The last noise was the worst. I could hear it clearly, right above my head, but it was pitch black and be damned if I was going to turn on the torch to see what it was. Instead, I gave the net a gentle push upwards. The sound stopped for a second, then I heard it again, the plop, plop, plop of something walking on my net. A second push and it was gone, leaving me to hope that I didn't just upset a tarantula or flesh-eating rodent (yes, I am sure they exist).

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Feliz domingo de Pascua

We've just realised that it's Easter Sunday. Our first ever Easter Sunday without chocolate.

It's not all bad though. The rain has stopped, nothing made it inside our mosquito nets while we were sleeping, and we've had an incident-free bath in the river. (Elu assures us that its safe, but then again he also says we won't encounter any jaguars if we need to get up to go to the toilet tonight ... but he's forgotten that we saw paw prints on the way here this morning!)


Carl taking a bath in the Rio Tuichi

Our jungle home for the next two nights


We're safely ensconced in our mosquito nets on the jungle floor. It's raining outside, but we are covered by a makeshift roof - a tarp hung over three sticks, tied with bark.

We hiked for four hours to get here, and I have to say it was bloody tough. Our guide, Elu, is 56 and he's the fittest person among us. He doesn't say much but we discovered yesterday that he's prone to off road adventures. One tiny sound in the distance is enough to send him diving into the foliage without warning, gesturing wildly for us to follow. Yesterday it was wild pigs. We chased them until we stumbled into a muddy clearing. Pigs scattered in every direction, screeching, snorting and stomping all around us. The air was thick with humidity, sweat poured out of us. The stench was almost too much. Elu made us sit there for ten minutes, waiting for the pigs to return. By the time we got back to the normal 'path', we looked and smelt no better than pigs ourselves.

Carl enjoys fresh water straight from a tree

Today, though, he was all business. He moved so fast through the foliage, seeing tracks where we only saw shrubs. With packs full of food and supplies for the next three days, we wobbled across fallen logs, along dry river beds, stumbled down muddy hills, tripped over tree roots, walked into spider webs, sunk into boggy marshes and sweated like bastards.

We've set up camp and eaten our lunch of rice and chicken. Now we're all exhausted. Time for a siesta before we head out tonight to look for tarantulas.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

What have we done?

Carl on mosquito watch

We've been at our jungle camp for five minutes and already we're wondering if we have what it takes to survive the next four days. I've got a monster mosquito bite on my forehead and an ominous lump forming on my foot. Carl is examining the holes in our mosquito nets and applying unhealthy quantities of DEET to every part of his body, even those covered by clothing. (He's heard the mozzies in the jungle are so vicious they bite through your clothes, so he's not taking any chances).

We are in Madidi National Park, one of the most biologically and culturally diverse protected areas on earth. It's a world away from the pampas. This is the real Amazon, the one you see in the movies, with jaguars, tarantulas and all kinds of nasties.

Our camp is located on the bank of the Rio Tuichi, three hours by boat from Rurrenabaque. The facilities are basic: a few small cabins, two toilets, cold showers and a kitchen. Most people stay at the camp for two nights, using it as a base for short hikes into the jungle.

But we're not 'most people'.
We're spending one night in the camp, then hiking deeper into the jungle tomorrow morning and spending the next two nights camping on the jungle floor. It sounded like fun when we were in Rurrenabaque. Now we're not so sure ...

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Guide - 11, Tourists - 1

The ones that didn't get away

That's how good we were at piranha fishing. Bismarck was reeling them in, one after the other, while we spent most of our time putting more meat on our hooks. We got our own back though. We feasted on the little devils for lunch - they're actually really tasty fish, albeit little. A fitting final meal in the pampas. Now, it's time for our afternoon siesta before we head back to Rurrenabaque. The hammocks are beckoning ...

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

A black caiman is lurking near the toilet


We think he's trying to hide. He hasn't moved at all in the last 15 minutes, but his red eyes shine like little beacons in the black water. The black caiman is the second largest species of crocodile, after the saltwater crocodile, but it's the largest predator in the Amazon basin. These guys can grow to seven metres long. Eek!

Swimming with pink dolphins

"Was that you Carl?"
"No."
"Oh crap."

"Tranquillo, tranquillo," said Bismarck. Easy for him to say. He wasn't hanging off the edge of the canoe waiting for something to nibble off a digit. It was hard to stay calm.

Hanging of the edge of the dugout

We were drifting in deep water. The dark brown colour made it impossible to see more than a couple of centimetres below the surface. But there was definitely something down there. I felt it brush against my leg. If it wasn't Carl, I hoped like hell it was a dolphin. According to Bismarck, where there were dolphins there weren't piranhas or alligators. I hoped he was
right.

A dolphin swims towards the dugout

Two small pods of dolphins were swimming nearby, gradually getting closer and closer to the canoe. They'd been scared away earlier by a boatload of Israeli tourists, who'd bomb dived, smoked bongs and screamed, then wondered where the dolphins went. Thankfully, they didn't stay long.


Something nudged my leg. This time I was sure it was a dolphin ... it felt too smooth to be Carl's leg, too soft to be an alligator and too big to be a piranha. I tried to relax. The dolphins were swimming underneath, letting us move our feet across their backs. Every now and again, you could feel one nibble on your toes. They have much longer snouts than other dolphins we'd seen, and really sharp teeth. Move your foot too quickly and they could draw blood, but they didn't mean too.

Carl braves the dolphins

Reluctantly we pulled ourselves back into the canoe. None of us wanted to leave, but it was getting late in the afternoon. Mosquito hour was nearly upon us. It was time to DEET up and hit the sunset bar. What an amazing experience.

Back in the hammock ...

... after a tough and unsuccessful morning hunting for anacondas in the hot smelly swamps of the pampas. Those slimy little suckers are not easy to find. We sloshed around in the heat for a couple of hours, battling mosquitos as big as birds and trying desperately not to fall face first into the mud. And we found nothing. Not even a little squiggly line in the mud. Nada.

Happy anaconda hunting!

We're beginning to wonder if we're going about this the wrong way. After spending two hours searching the swamps for alligators last night, we woke up to find ourselves virtually surrounded by giant lizards. A massive alligator lurked in the water near the toilets. Another sat next to the kitchen steps, hoping for some food. After breakfast, we found one lying ominously under our cabin, while another watched while we brushed our teeth.

Pedro the alligator under our cabin

The moral of the story: don't go after the animals, let the animals come to you. If we're lucky, it'll be an anaconda joining us for coffee in the morning ... or maybe we'll find one curled up in a hammock for an afternoon siesta. Speaking of afternoon siestas, is it that time already?

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

In search of alligators ...

Sunset in the pampas

Bet you thought we wouldn't get out of the hammocks, did you? Well, we did. We covered ourselves in DEET, armed ourselves with torches and climbed back into the dugout to go in search of alligators.

According to Bizmark, alligator spotting is best done at night. And it's true, there are hundreds of them out there lurking on the edge of the river. Their beady red eyes give them away instantly, but be damned if you can get near enough to see anything else. We searched for two hours - a pair of red eyes would send Bizmark into a frenzy and he all but dived into the water at least three times - to no avail. So we retired to the Sunset Bar (one of two hidden in the pampas) for a consolatory beer ...

Not a hugely successful alligator hunt, but this little tucker was cute

Then suddenly, there was a commotion out back. Bizmark had dived into the shallow water behind the bar and run through the swamp. We thought he'd gone mad. But he emerged with huge smile on his face. He'd found an alligator. Granted, it was a tiny alligator and he didn't seen too happy about having his evening disturbed. In fact, he peed on Carl to prove it. But it was an alligator. Can't argue with that.

It's animal madness in the pampas

Cruising through the pampas in our little dugout

Carl is sleeping in the hammock next to me. He's worn out, poor bugger. Too much excitement already today: pink dolphins swimming beside our dugout canoe, turtles sunning themselves on submerged tree branches, monkeys flinging themselves from tree to tree above our heads, and spectacularly-coloured birds trying to look inconspicuous in the green foliage. Oh, and let's not forget the parrot, monkey and wild pig in our restaurant at lunchtime.

Our little monkey friends

This part of the Amazon is known as the pampas (lowlands). A vast flat expanse of land filled to the brim with wacky and wonderful animals. It took us nearly six hours to get here - three rough hours in the back of an old jeep along dusty dirt roads and three cruising down a river in dugout canoe built by nearby villagers.
It's the end of rainy season, so the river level is still rising. According to our guide, Bizmark, it's going to be tough to find anacondas. But he promises us piranhas, alligators, caymans and more.


The best spot in the camp!

Our camp is simple: little wooden shacks connected by wooden walkways, and row of hammocks that just beg you to lie down. We can see the water underneath our cabin through the large gaps in the floorboards (eek!). It seems that mosquito nets are our only real protection against the nasties that come out to play after sunset.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Rurrenabaque: gateway to the Bolivian Amazon

Rurrenabaque Airport

In Rurrenabaque, a wooden shack poses as the airport and a strip of grass poses as a runway. The only planes that land here are dinky small - 20-seats only - and the pilots are also flight attendants and ground crew: they welcome you on board, open the door when you land, roll out the stairs to the runway, and check the wings and the propellers. The ground crew unload the baggage and leave it on the grass for you to collect. Then they manually push the plane forward and give it some gas for the return journey. It's perfect really. You don't want to fly into the Amazon and find a state of the art airport where 50 hectares of protected forest used to be, do you?

The canopy of the Amazon from our dinky small plane

It took us just 45-minutes to leave the dizzying heights of La Paz behind. Now the smog-filled chaotic streets of the Bolivian capital feel like a world away. The flight took us through the spectacular snow capped peaks of the Andes and directly over Amazon. The deep green canopy stretched as far as we could see, broken only by long snaking rivers that link this part of the Amazon basin with the Rio Amazonas.

We're now just 105m above sea level, the weather is hot and humid (finally!), and we're surrounded on all sides by jungle. Dirt bikes whizz past us on the dirt roads. Mosquitoes buzz in our ears. Every bar and restaurant claims to have the 'coldest beer in town'. And everything happens on Rurrenabaque time. Yep, I think we're going to love this crazy jungle town.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Never heard of Lucha Libre?

Neither had we. But we freaking love it. This is WWF Bolivian style: ninja turtles, men in skin tight leopard print suits, midgets, pyrotechnics, army dudes, bitch fights. You name it, they've got it and then some.

A ninja turtle wrestling a skeleton? Now we've seen it all.

Lucha Libre is Sunday night entertainment for the locals of El Alto, a sprawling city just outside of La Paz stretching from the rim of Rio Choqueyapu across the Altiplano. El Alto is the place to go for a taste of indigenous Bolivia if you don't have time to venture far from the capital. It also offers the best views of La Paz - from up here, you can see the the neighbourhoods of mud brick houses that spill over the canyon rim and down the slopes on three sides to the business districts and wealthier neighbourhoods that occupy the more tranquil lower altitudes. In the background looms the snow-capped peak of Mt Illimani (6402m). But none of that compares to Lucha Libre.

When we arrived, the stadium was packed with Bolivian families. They scream, they cheer, they throw food and drinks at the wrestlers. The wrestlers throw stuff back at them. Fights break out in the stands, the announcer gets attacked and his microphone stolen. A midget gets thrown across the ring, the army dude runs around screaming when his crotch is set alight. 'Paramedics' run onto the stage and administer magic water. And kids line up to get
their photo taken with their favourite wrestler at the end of each match.
The highlight: cholita wrestling

It's nuts, that's for sure. But its not the highlight. This business is all about the cholitas - Quechuan and Aymara women who live in the city but continue to wear traditional dress - and they don't disappoint. Dressed prettily in full skirts, crocheted shawls and bowlers hats, these chicks are hard-core. They pull at each others plaits, punch, kick, throw each other across the ring and take out the referee. They don't hold back. And when they lose they get brutal. Full bottles of soft drink are pegged into the crowd, railings torn down and abuse screamed over the microphone. WWF ain't got nothing on these crazy ladies. Lucha Libre is where its at.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

'No number twos'

So we made it to La Paz. No problems with the driver or the roads, but a problem with the 'no number two' toilet rule. A big problem. And one that lasted 10 hours. Damn that gringo who can't read a simple Spanish sign.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Political madness, dino tracks and gringo buses

We've finally succumbed to the lure of a cama (bed) bus. In Argentina, this would have been pretty special - fully reclining seats, meals, booze, functioning toilets, blankets and pillows. But this is Bolivia, so our seats only recline half-way, there's no food, and a sign on the toilet prohibits 'number twos'. None of that matters though. We're hoping that the extra cash we paid for this gringo bus is going to buy us safety and a sober driver. To hell with comfort.

You see, this is our first overnight bus in Bolivia - not something to be taken lightly if our shorter Bolivian bus journeys are anything to go by. Bad roads, bad vehicles and bad drivers are what we've come to expect, but we're trying to remain optimistic. We smelt no booze on the driver when we got on, so that's a good sign. But we're just about to leave and there's a young boy standing in the aisle singing (if you could call it that) about safe journeys. Not sure how to interpret that one.

We're heading from Sucre to Bolivia's capital, La Paz. Sucre was an odd little place. Nice enough, with beautiful colonial buildings, a leafy plaza and fantastic juice stands, but a bit odd all the same.
Our favourite juice stand

Anyway, here's a couple of crazy things we discovered in Sucre.

A president that can't speak Spanish?
The Bolivian declaration of independence was signed at the Casa de Libertaded on Sucre's main plaza in 1825. We visited the casa today and stumbled across an inte
resting fact about a past Bolivian president.

Political stability has eluded Bolivia for deca
des. The country has been through about 190 leaders since 1852 - their portraits fill an entire room in the casa - but one president (can't remember which one) stood out to us. This guy was born in Bolivia but lived his entire life in the United States, and he was elected as president of Bolivia even though he couldn't speak Spanish. Or at least that's what we overheard a guide telling a tour group. Crazy Bolivianos.

Dinosaur tracks?
Yep, just outside of Sucre, you'll find one of the largest dinosaur track sites in the world. The tracks were discovered by quarry workers, zigzagging across an enormous vertical rock. Apparently, the site was once the bottom of a lake which was pushed upright by the Andes. Rumour has it that UNESCO are planning to list the site next year, which means they're convinced that the tracks are real. And they looked real to us. Unfortunately, to get there, you have to ride the Dino Truck (with giant dinosaur claws on the roof) from the town's main plaza. The perfect way to humiliate a bunch of stupid gringos.

Tracks zigzag across the wall

The tracks up close

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Down a mine with the devil

Deep inside Cerro Rico are hundreds of statues of Tio, the devil of the mine

"We were once the richest city in the world, the biggest city in the world and the highest city in the world," said our Potosi guide, Pedro . "Now we are simply the highest city in the world. The highest city in the world with the smallest people. That's why we can work in the mines."

We are 4060m above sea level in the mining city of Potosi, the city which grew at the foot of one of the world's largest mines. Here, you need to walk a little slower, eat a little less and sleep a little longer. Or you need to be made of tougher stuff, like the Potosinos.

"This mine used to be called Cerro Rico (Rich Hill)," says Pedro. "We should change its name to Poor hill. It makes no money for us now."

At the height of its splendour in the 17th century, Cerro Rico yielded a river of riches, fed
the Spaniards unrelenting thirst for silver and helped fuel the economic rise of Europe ... at an enormous human cost. The hill is honeycombed with mines and haunted by the ghosts of the millions of slaves who perished in its dark tunnels over three centuries. African and native Indian slaves forced to work in the mines during colonial times are said to have lasted, on average, less than six months in the mines, unaccustomed to the climate and the altitude and subjected to appalling conditions.

Today, conditions have improved little, but there are few rewards left for the hard Potosi miners. The average life expectancy of the miners is 35 to 45 years.

Miners run through the mines, pushing tonnes of rock and rarely stopping for a break

Our guide Pedro started working in the mines when he was 10.
Mining was in his blood. He and his two brothers worked alongside their father. At 15, he developed a back problem from hunching over heavy wheelbarrows and his mining career was over. He now gives tours of the mines twice a day. He was lucky.

Yesterday we crawled and climbed our way 80m into one of the mines. It was not a pleasant experience. In fact, it was shocking. The first two levels of the mine are no longer worked - whatever riches were here were plundered years ago - so most miners work on the fourth level in small claustrophobic caves.



This man works between eight and 12 hours a day for less than $US200 a month. He doesn't emerge for a lunch break. He chews bags of cocoa leaves to help him through. On Friday evenings, he joins other miners for a drink at the shrine of Tio (the devil of the mine). They give offerings of cocoa leaves to Tio and once a year they sacrifice a llama and offer Tio the llama blood in the hope that he will spare their lives. Their drink of choice is sugar cane alcohol - 96% proof.

Pedro tells us about some of the success stories: people who have struck it rich after a big silver or tin discovery. I ask whether the miners want to stay in the mine or if they leave once they have enough money. He tells me that its like a drug. They tell themselves that they will work the mines until they have enough money to buy a new car. When they get a new car, they tell themselves that they will work the mines until they have enough money to buy a house. Then another car. Then a TV.

Then their good luck comes to an end. Silver and tin prices plummet. Their minerals run out. They need a new section to mine, so they sell their car. Then their house. Soon they are broke and, of course, still stuck in the mines.

The air in the mines feels toxic. We wear bandannas over our nose and mouth to keep out the dust. But its not easy to breathe. The heat on the third and fourth level is stifling. Most miners work shirtless. Ladders to get to the lower levels are broken. In parts, we have to jump to reach the next level - over a dark black hole that leads to god knows where. This has to be one of the most dangerous things we've done, but the miners do this everyday for 30 years. Pedro tells us that they know the mine so well that if they have a problem with their lamps, they can find their way out of the mine in the dark. We'd have no hope. Even if we could find the tunnel out, we'd fall into a ditch or knock ourselves out on the pipes and wood sticking out of the walls.

Pedro tells us that no tourist has died in the mines ... yet. In fact, few miners die of cave ins. Most of the accidental deaths in the mine are caused by the toxic gases that sneak up on the miners while they work.

Carl and Dave model with live dynamite

Before we entered the mine, we stop at the miners market to buy gifts for the miners. Potosi must be the only place in the world where anyone can by dynamite. Apparently, every now and again, a young kid blows his arm off playing with dynamite and there's a crack down. Pedro says it lasts about a week. If you stop miners from buying dynamite, the people of Potosi would starve. We buy two bags of dynamite - one to give to the miners and the other to blow up after our tour. We also buy bottles of soft drink, which we give to the miners as they run past us in the mines pushing trolleys full of rocks. To get the minerals out of the mines, they put the rocks into bags and use a manual pulley system. It's bloody tough work. Pedro warns us not to get into a fight with a Potosi miner. "There will only ever be one winner."

Setting off the dynamite after the tour is a health and safety nightmare. Pedro and a couple of other guides sit on the ground outside the entrance and attach a fuse and a bag of fertiliser to the dynamite. They light it and hand the makeshift bomb around the dumb tourists for photographs. Carl and Dave love it. When the fuses start to get a little low, Pedro takes back the dynamite and runs 50 metres down the hill. The stupid tourists start to follow them, eager to get the best possible shot of the explosion. Pero, pero (stop, stop), yells a guide. Running after a lit bomb is really not a smart idea. Thankfully, they stop.

The explosions are enormous. Much bigger than I expected. Four hours later, our ears are still ringing, our throats still ache from the dust and toxins, our muscles hurt from crawling and climbing through the dark tunnels, and we feel emotionally and physically exhausted. It's an experience we'll never forget. Ever.

More photos

Saturday, March 08, 2008

This is not a mirage

Emma destroys Carl with her new powers

Bolivia's Salar de Uyuni has magical powers. I am now six times the size as Carl and 10 times as powerful.

Don't believe me? Smart move. A giant, all-powerful Emma would be amazing, but it hasn't happened yet. Still, when you're looking across the bright white expanse of the Salar, it does feel pretty magical.

A perfect reflection as the sun rises over the Salar

Covering 12000 sq. km, the Salar sits 3653m above sea level and is between six and seven metres deep in parts. It was the piece de resistance of our journey through south west Bolivia, and it didn't disappoint.

We set out early this morning, well before dawn.
During the rainy season, a shallow layer of water covers the salt flats and acts as a giant mirror. We drove slowly, watching as everything around us turned to pink, then red, then orange. The view was spectacular. Unbelievable. The reflection in the water was perfect, making it impossible to tell where the sky finishes and the land begins.

We watched in silence, then drove quietly to Isle de los Pescadores, one of several islands that pop up around the Salar. From the top of the Isle, the blinding white of this salt desert stretches as far as the eye can see. In fact, if you didn't know better, you'd swear it had been snowing.

The view from the top of Isle de los Pescadores

The Salar de Uyuni is estimated to contain 10 billion tons of salt, of which less than 25,000 tons is extracted annually. A handful of families from the nearby village of Colchani mine the salt on the edge of the Salar. It's a simple operation. They extract the salt using a pick, rake it into piles and initial the piles for credit with the truck drivers that pick them up. They work for hours each day in the hot Andean sun. Scarves or ski masks protect their faces from the blinding glare on the white Salar. Unsurprisingly, like miners all over South America, they work hard for little reward.

Colchani, a small mining village on the edge of the Salar

Friday, March 07, 2008

Tupiza to Uyuni: day three

I think the Sol de Manana geyser basin did it. It can't have been the altitude. The geyser basin is high at 4850m, but we've been higher over the last couple of days. That means it must have been the sulphur fumes that sent Carl and Eoin loco last night. At the very least, it clouded their judgement. You don't have to be Einstein to work out that seven-hours in a jeep at altitude with a hangover is going to hurt like hell. But, I suppose, it always seems like a good idea at the time.

On the upside, food is no longer my enemy. I am feeling human enough to leave the jeep and take over photography duties. It's a good thing too because the Southern Altiplano wasn't finished with us yet.

Before lunch:
  • the fiery red Laguna Colorada, home to three different types of flamingos
  • wild vicuna - thought to be an ancestor of the domesticated llama, the vicuna faced extinction until national park authorities in Chile and Bolivia stepped in. Now they can be seen roaming the lower parts of the highlands.
  • Rocas de Dali - you'd be excused for thinking that the surrealist master actually did have a hand in creating this landscape. This sandy rocky out crop is a great place for ADTs and other stupidity. Unfortunately, we arrived at the same time as another tour. Carl and Eoin had kept them up all night with their singing, so they looked none too happy to see us. Oops.
Flamingos at Laguna Colorada

Rocas de Dali

After lunch:
  • our first taste of the salares (salt flats) that link Bolivia and Chile. The Salar de Uyuni is the world's largest salt flat. It's so damn big that you can see it from space, so driving across even just this small part feels surreal. Can't imagine what it's going to feel like tomorrow when we drive the length of it.
We get our first taste of the salt flats and Carl and Dave get excited

Tonight we're bedding down in a little hospedaje made of salt. If we wanted to, we could lick the walls, nibble on our beds and use the salt on the floor to flavour our dinner. Clever little Bolivians.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Oh, I almost forgot ...

Today we also stumbled across a rare breed of mammal: the D4. It was a very exciting discovery. According to Eoin and Laura, the D4 are rarely seen outside of Dublin's D4 postcode, where they sponge of their wealthy parents. But this one had ventured far from its natural habitat. We spotted it languishing in a hot spring pool, trying desperately to impress nearby females with hair flicks and camera tricks.

The D4 can be easily spotted in a pack if you know what you're looking for. Key characteristics include:

  • badly dyed long blonde hair
  • a posh Irish accent
  • an enormous ego.

Be alert. They can be extremely annoying.

Tupiza to Uyuni: day two

Okay, we're convinced. Bolivia really does have it all.

Ruined mining villages? Check
Green lagoons? Check
Red lagoons? Check
Pink flamingos? Check
Hot springs? Check
Bubbling, steaming geysers? Check
More volcanoes than you can poke a stick at? Check

Health update: Dave's alive. Emma remains broken.

A big bubbling stinking geyser

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Tupiza to Uyuni: day one

It's been a day of ups and downs. In less than eight hours, we've:
  • climbed higher than 4000m and looked down into sepia-coloured valleys
  • eaten lunch with llamas in the pampas (lowlands) with nothing but grass for miles
  • stood in the shadow of snow-capped mountains and dormant volcanoes
  • passed through tiny mud clay villages, where the people scratch a living from mining or agriculture.
Our first proper llama sighting

Along the way we met two little girls. One told us her name was Alberta, the other refused to speak. Their village is set in an open dusty plain. The land is arid and a fierce wind whips
around the dirt streets. The harshness of the environment is etched into their skin, which is dark and dry.

Alberta

Tonight we are staying in a small hospedaje operated by a small local woman, who bustles about and says little. God knows where we are, but its warm and comfortable. Dave is confined to bed, with a raging fever and nausea. We've discovered that altitude is not his friend. Or mine for that matter. Dave projectile vomited the entire contents of his stomach (and then some) out the window of the jeep after lunch. And I suffered a severe relapse this morning, which makes us wonder if my 'nasty little bug' in Tilcara was actually altitude sickness. The juries still out. Neither of us can stomach coca leaves though, so we're done with that little ruse.

The poor Irish couple - Eoin and Laura - who've joined us on this four day jeep ride across southern Bolivia to Uyuni must be wondering what the hell they've got themselves into. Luckily for Carl, Eoin is also mad about football; they've been dissecting every football league in detail all day. But he's also got a dirty little obsession with Home and Away and I can tell that its only a matter of time before we've moved on from the Premier League to Summer Bay.

Local villagers barely acknowledge our presence

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Ode to the coca leaf

Carl and Dave are talking cowboys and Indians. They're sitting on a couple of rocks, with cheeks full of coca leaves, and they're talking cowboys and Indians. Not that you can blame them really. There's a real country and western vibe in these parts. Things are dusty, dry and harsh. Rocks are a deep red and have been sharpened by the wind to look like giant fins. Even the plants look tough, although I suppose they have to be to survive out here. It all makes you want to jump on a horse, spit tobacco and snooze in the shade with a hat over your face.

The 'fins'
You see, we're in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid territory. According to local legend, the two outlaws met their maker in a nearby mining village, after a botched robbery attempt. Some say they were buried out here, but their graves have never been discovered. Still, if you've got a day or two, you can head to the site of their final stand wearing your best set of chaps and really get all wild west.
We haven´t done that. We've booked our trip to the Salar de Uyuni for tomorrow and I am still only half human, so we decided to test my mettle with a little hike to El Canon, a canyon (crazy I know) about 5kms out of town.

El canon

Actually it was more a stroll than a hike, but I have survived aided just a little by a gobful of coca leaves. The locals swear by them for any kind of ailment and who are we to argue. You stuff a handful into the side of your mouth, chew a little, maybe add some bicarbonate soda to get things moving a little quicker and let them do their thing. In a little while, your lips and gums are numb and you've reached the little waterfall at the end of the canyon without raising a sweat. Now we´re resting in the sun. Carl and Dave are talking gibberish. We´ve got enough coca leaves to get us safely back to town. All is well again.

Our bag of coca leaves

Monday, March 03, 2008

The journey from hell: Tilcara to Tupiza on a bus with no toilet

Travel lesson #522: Never attempt long bus rides with a dodgy stomach. They are not fun, not even in the slightest. Highlights of the trip included:

  • Overloaded buses - people in the seats in the aisles and in the doorway. Absolutely no way out in a hurry
  • No air-conditioning and no open windows - the stale stench of coca leaves and deep fried street snacks is difficult to cope with at the best of times, but when you haven't held down anything except two dry crackers in two days it's disastrous
  • Travel sick children - one poor little lad clearly felt worse than me and proved it by vomiting in the aisle at my feet
  • Border crossing formalities - get this stamped, fill out this form, walk back and get another stamp, join this line, carry your giant pack back and forth across the border three times until you're ready to pass out
  • Realising too late that the toilets in the bus station don't flush - the less we say about that the better
  • Bus drivers who dream of becoming rally car drivers - speeding over rocks, potholes and collapsed bridges in a rusty old school bus with no suspension and windows that bounce is not just uncomfortable, it's insane.

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Tilcara: a little gem in the north west

A friendly local


Tilcara wasn't even on our radar five days ago. We wanted to see a bit more of the Jujuy province, one of the poorest regions in Argentina and one of the most indigenous. The plan was simple:
  • stop in San Salvador de Jujuy
  • be a bit lazy and take some tours into the surrounding countryside
  • head north to Humahuaca for some sandboarding
  • scoot over the border into Bolivia.
San Salvador de Jujuy turned out a strange mix of Argentina and Bolivia: large leafy plazas, beautiful colonial buildings and cosy cafes on the one hand, and lively markets, potholed roads, Quechua street sellers and coca leaves on the other. But the tour agencies in this city ruined everything. They tried to flog us bad tours at inflated prices. We had visions of our Cafayate rock tour all over again - drive, take a photo of a rock, drive, take a photo of a rock, repeat 20 times - and decided to hightail it out of there. The new plan went like this:
  • escape from the rip-off tour agencies
  • stop in Tilcara for a night and visit the Cerro de los Siete Colores (Hill of Seven Colours)
  • head north to Humahuaca for some sandboarding and check out the World Heritage-listed Quebrada de Humahuaca along the way
  • scoot over the border into Bolivia.
But Tilcara surprised us. Surrounded by giant hills on all sides, Tilcara is a pretty little regional town with dirt roads, mud brick houses, friendly dogs and good cafes. We stumbled across a cracking hostel with amazing views, hammocks, and fresh fruit juice for breakfast. We wandered around the ruins of El Pucara, a pre-Columbian fort set high on a hill just outside the village, and decided to stay another night.

El Pucara

The next day we set out early - before dawn - and hiked to the top of a nearby canyon to watch the sunrise. The hike was amazing but taxing. The hammocks and the sunshine beckoned. A new plan emerged:

  • skip Humahuaca and go sandboarding in Peru
  • stay another night in Tilcara, laze in hammocks and work on our tans (this is a holiday after all)
  • scoot over the border to Bolivia.

Halfway through the hike and the altitude takes its toll on Carl

This morning, however, Dave climbed aboard the bus to the border alone. A nasty little bug has attacked my insides, making it impossible for me to hold down food or venture more than a metre or two from the bathroom. We're stuck in Tilcara for another night, night four.

Here's the kicker though: we've promised to meet Dave in Tupiza tomorrow to start a four-day jeep trip to the Salar de Uyuni. Tupiza is eight hours away by dirt road on buses with no toilets.
In preparation, Carl has emptied the local pharmacy. He's armed with an arsenal of drugs and thinks I'll make it to Tupiza without incident. Needless to say, I'm less optimistic.